What Does Demure Mean, Exactly ?

Traditionally, the word “demure” is used to describe someone who is modest, reserved, or serious. It’s a term often associated with quiet elegance and a subtle, unassuming presence. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, “demure” has been in use for nearly seven centuries, illustrating the timeless nature of this characteristic.

A “demure” dress from the 1950s.

But in today’s context, the meaning of “demure” has been both preserved and reinterpreted, particularly through the lens of social media trends.


Who Started the Demure Trend?

The current wave of the demure trend can largely be credited to TikTok influencer Jools Lebron, known as @joolieannie on the platform. On August 5, Lebron (NOT THE BASKETBALL PLAYER) posted a video that has since gone viral, amassing over 35 million views. In the video, Jools describes how she presents herself at work, emphasizing the importance of being “very demure, very mindful.”

“You see how I do my makeup for work? Very demure, very mindful,” Jools says, encapsulating the essence of the trend. Her video sparked a surge of interest in the word, with the hashtag #demure being used nearly a million times since the video’s release. But the trend’s virality didn’t come without controversy.

The Controversy: Who Really Started the Demure Trend?

As with many viral trends, the origins of the demure trend have been contested. Another TikTok creator, Selyna (@trapselena), claimed that she had started the trend back in 2021. This claim sparked a heated debate on the platform, with many users searching for the “original demure video” and questioning who truly popularized the trend.

@blachannamontana

😂😂😂😂”off my dome” got me for some reason #selyna #demure #joolslebron

♬ original sound – blachannamontana

Selyna accused Jools of stealing the concept, asserting that she had been using the word “demure” in her content long before it became a trend. However, many TikTok users have defended Jools, arguing that her video resonated differently and was executed in a way that made it go viral.

“It’s not just about who said it first; it’s about how it was said,” commented one user, capturing the essence of the debate. Others pointed out that “demure” is an English word that belongs to everyone, while some argued that the term has roots in the LGBTQ+ ballroom scene.


What Is the New Meaning Of Demure On Social Media ?

In the context of the TikTok trend, “demure” has taken on a nuanced meaning. While it still conveys the traditional sense of modesty and reservation, it’s also been used humorously and ironically. Jools Lebron’s videos, though initially serious in tone, have been interpreted as a satirical take on workplace etiquette and societal expectations.

Jools goes on to give more advice on how one should dress and behave when they go to work, describing demure as the standard of how one should carry themselves. (Credit: TikTok / @joolieannie)

In essence, the demure trend has become a way for users to navigate the fine line between sincerity and irony. It’s about maintaining a polished, understated appearance—whether at work, on a plane, or even while engaging with hotel staff—while also poking fun at the rigid standards often imposed on people, especially women.


Why the Cultural Sweep Of Demure Trend Matters

The resurgence of the word “demure” and its adoption by younger generations, Gen Z, Gen Alpha and even Millennials, speaks to a broader cultural shift. In an age where boldness and self-expression are often celebrated, the “demure” trend offers a counterbalance, reminding people of the value of subtlety and restraint. It also highlights the power of social media in shaping and redefining language, breathing new life into old words and concepts.

The trend has also sparked discussions about workplace etiquette, personal branding, and the importance of being mindful in various aspects of life. As more people engage with the trend, it continues to evolve, with users finding new and creative ways to interpret and apply the concept of “demure.”

@ash_kholm

VERY Demure @Khloé Kardashian @Jools Lebron @Dimitri Giannetos #verydemure

♬ original sound – Ash K HOLM
@jlo

Very demure … very mindful 🩵

♬ original sound – JLO
Since Jool’ viral video, ‘Demure’ have gotten the attention of celebrities like Khloe Kardashian and Jennifer Lopez.

While the trend began as a humorous take on workplace appearance, it has grown into a broader conversation about mindfulness, modesty, and the way we present ourselves to the world. Whether you’re on TikTok or not, the influence of this trend is undeniable, making “demure” a meme worth watching in the coming months.

So, next time you hear someone say they’re being “very demure, very mindful,” you’ll know exactly what they mean.


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